#DarkNL2014: A Survivor’s Tale

This is a survivor’s tale. I survived #DarkNL2014. I, like countless others, had to endure the cold and the darkness, sometimes for as long as five hours. I did not, however, escape unchanged. I hope to live a little long so that I may tell this tale of survival.

OK, so #DarkNL2014 wasn’t that big of a deal. It was a pain in the ass, but by no means anything like what happened in Toronto. Now, I don’t want to do one of those “bys got it worse in Africa so stop yer complainin.” What I would like to do is voice some of my – and perhaps others’ – gripes.

Maury-DarkNL

The biggest problem was lack of communication. Why couldn’t citizens be notified when to expect a blackout and for how long? People would’ve been much more patient had they been given enough to time to prepare. I mean, I was sittin around stinking of BO because I was too afraid to get in the shower, lest the power shut off and I go tits up and fall on me arse!

Also, you can’t help but feel resentful when you’ve been sitting in the dark for hours and others seem to be hardly affected at all. I can only offer anecdotal evidence, but I heard many people calling into Open Line to say houses just across their street had power, but they had none. My sister for example, who lives in Paradise, was rarely affected by the rolling blackouts (which, by the way, sounds like falling down a hill after too many Blackhorse).

And what was up with blaming this all on xmas light? I find that hard to believe. It probably had more to do with the McMansions that have built as of late around St. John’s, whose inhabitants feel the need to live in a Swedish Spa (source). Moreover, why are we so focused on piddly xmas lights when businesses like Avalon Ford on Kenmount Rd. harnesses the power of the sun for spotlights in their parking lot?

Simpsons-DarkNL-300x225

This whole thing seems to have come from aging infrastructure. After years in the shitter, Newfoundland is finally booming, and the have nots are no more. Unfortunately, we haven’t kept up with the boom. Understandable. Luckily, we’ve got a fancy schmancy project called Muskrat Falls. You might have heard about it. Apparently, it’s gonna light up the Rock like Prometheus’ stolen fire.

Dunderdale seems to have put all her eggs in Prometheus’ basket. Too bad that dude got his ass chained to a rock so an eagle can pluck out his liver every day for an eternity. Based on the plebs on Open Line, Dunderdale can probably look forward to the same fate. This is somewhat unfair, though. While she bungled an opportunity to demonstrate her leadership, I’m not ready to throw her under the bus. The amount of flack she’s gotten is a touch unfair. As if Danny Williams could’ve saved the day with the everlasting light that glows outta his areshole. Still, I wouldn’t be surprised if the PCs looked for a new Fuhrer come election time.

Mostly, what I hope Newfoundlanders take away from #DarkNL is this: 1) We seriously need to upgrade our infrastructure. Any politician who denies this shouldn’t be taken seriously. 2) Learn to use electricity more responsibly. You don’t have to stew in your own juices in your living room! Also, maybe y’all will invest in a wood stove. I got one, and, buddy, let me tell ya, she’s a bute!

Anyways, happy Hunger Games. And may the odds be ever in your favour!

1514536_10152134071706416_349325141_nCheers

-B

PS. I should note that I found all these image macros on various social media. I dunno the OP. If you’re OP, please lemme know, and I’ll give you proper cred.

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~ by braddunne on January 9, 2014.

One Response to “#DarkNL2014: A Survivor’s Tale”

  1. OK Brad. Some of what you said I agree with whole-heartedly. However, I differ on two things:

    It wasn’t so much the piddly arse amount of juice Christmas lights burn, it’s the fucked up ignoramous attitude of those who lived in the houses lit up like Times Square to help celebrate the commercial side birth of Christ. If someone is arsehole enough to leave the lights on, do you think they’re going to worry about turning down the heaters a notch or two, or leave the dishwasher / dryer {insert high energy using appliance here} during peak times? Not friggin’ likely.

    Now, on to infrastructure. The nay-sayers, the conspiracy theorists, and in general, those who hate “The Man” (be it government, the heads of Nalcor / Hydro / NL Power), Christ, maybe even the Occupy movement all blame capacity and say “I lived in northern Ontario / Da ‘Peg / Fort Mac and this shit never happened there in the winter”. Well, for one, they experience these conditions several times a winter, EVERY winter, whereas here, we just went through a once in a hundred year situation, with temps so cold with so much wind for so long that none of us may live to see it again. And to top it off, less than 5% of houses / businesses / institutions in those locations use 220 V electricity for heat, they use natural gas. You know that, you lived up in the Big Smoke. Here, especially inside the overpass, nearly everything is heated by electricity.

    Now, how often have we experienced blackouts and brownouts in the summer? Not nearly as often as they do on the mainland, where it gets hotter, everything is cooled by electricity. I lived through the “blackout of 2003” that left millions of people in the without power for 2 days in 100+ temperatures

    Same shit we get here, different temps and seasons.

    As for Dunderdale (and you know I’m a PC, I hate the Libby’s policies and despise the Dippers), she shagged up an golden opportunity to shine, a perfect chance to show she had her knickers on straight, and what did she prove (to me anyway)? That she isn’t fit to lead. I don’t think she had any idea what was going on. Did you see her on TV Sunday afternoon with Martin and the other fella? She was so nervous she was out of breath! Jesus, she wouldn’t have passed Dale Carnegie 101 the way she acted there she was so far out of her element.

    Your turn Cuz

    Jamie

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